Sweet Valley Confidential: Ten Years Later
Francine Pascal



rating: 3.5 out of 10 "books"

“Sweet Valley is back ... What terrible secret has torn Jessica and Elizabeth apart? Ten years after graduating from Sweet Valley High, the Wakefield twins have had a falling out of epic proportions. After Jessica commits a complete and utter betrayal, Elizabeth flees to New York to escape the pain and pursue her lifelong dream of becoming a journalist. Jessica remains behind in Sweet Valley, dealing with the fallout of her heart-wrenching choices and longing for forgiveness. But Elizabeth can't forget her twin's duplicity. Uncharacteristically, she decides the only way to heal her broken heart is to seek revenge. Always the 'good' twin, Elizabeth is about to turn the tables” – Amazon.com Review

Imagine my surprise when I found out Francine Pascal was writing a Sweet Valley book. It’s like it came out of nowhere, although I suppose I shouldn’t be too surprised with all the reboots of everything from television to film to books. Even the Babysitter’s Club author is apparently writing more BSC books. If anything, Pascal’s novel is long overdue. I feel out of touch with this series since it’s been so long since I’ve read a new Sweet Valley book. Much in the same way, I feel like Francine Pascal has gotten a bit out of touch when it comes to young people. While I don’t mean to slam Francine Pascal, especially since her books were my main lifeline during my early childhood, Sweet Valley Confidential just feels too late. I barely remember which character was which, let alone their personalities or actions from the early Sweet Valley books up through the college years. As many readers stated on the amazon.com website too, there were a ton of inconsistencies within the book and major disparity between characters then and now. It was as if Pascal herself forgot to refresh her memory by revisiting all her previous books prior to writing Confidential. The most laughable parts that I found however had to do with the more intimate moments in the book, more specifically one that happened towards the end of Sweet Valley Confidential. The way Francine Pascal described the situation read like a cheesy romance novel, convincing me even more of how far removed from her audience she must be. While Sweet Valley was never anything remotely intellectual, Sweet Valley Confidential seems to have really missed the mark this time. While it was fun to read a new Sweet Valley book and revisit the Wakefield twins for nostalgia’s sake, I think this book would have been better if it had never been written to begin with.

Tell Me a Secret
Holly Cupala



rating: 9 out of 10 "books"

“It’s tough, living in the shadow of a dead girl. No one mentions my sister. If they do, it’s mentioning her by omission, relief that I am nothing like her. I am the good sister. Thank God.” – Tell Me a Secret pg. 1

It’s been five years since Miranda Mathison’s bad girl sister, Xanda, died, but the mystery surrounding her death and the secret Xanda took to her grave still haunts Miranda. Now seventeen, the age Xanda was when she died, Miranda, or Rand, is dealing with some issues of her own. Her perfect life: an awesome boyfriend, perfect best friend, and promising future at art school after graduation, are all shaken up when two little pink lines on a pregnancy test threaten to destroy everything Rand has worked so hard for. To top it all off, the shaky relationship she’s had with her mother all her life, especially after the death of her “failure” of a sister, feels like it’s been permanently derailed after the news of her pregnancy leaks.

But the truth is, Rand has always wanted to be like Xanda. Maybe that’s why she surrounds herself with bad girl Delaney, and had isolated herself from her once best friend, Essence. So while all these bad things keep happening to her, Rand can’t help but obsess over the vagueness of Xanda’s death, and the secret truth that her parents might be keeping from her surrounding the way her sister died. The only problem is that it seems everyone has turned against Rand, her best friend and boyfriend included. With no one to talk to, not even her parents, Rand is completely on her own in terms of her pregnancy.

Talk about capturing the essence of high school! True, I’ve been out of high school for quite awhile now, but it felt like I was sucked right back into the drama of it all whilst reading this book. I for one, know how hard high school can be; how mean, manipulative, clique-y, and backstabbing (even your good friends!) can be. Cupala was able to capture all of the emotional angst and hardships that many teens face while pursuing secondary education, even more so, when you’re a soon-to-be teenage mother. I would never wish what happened to Rand in this story on anyone. And if you thought your mother was bad, wait until you get a load of Rand’s mom. In a somewhat related note, I also thought Holly Cupala did a really awesome job of representing (no offense my teenage friends!), the kind of ignorance young people have at that age, whereas, instead of going and finding out the facts for sure yourself, making a judgment call and abandoning your friend(s), boyfriend, or girlfriend based on what someone else told you. There was so many times when I wanted to yell at certain characters in the book because things were so obvious to me as an adult reader, and so easy to fix, but understandably confusing to a teen.

The only downside, that I was able to think of when it came to this story, was Xanda’s “secret.” Either the author was really unclear about what it actually was, or I just assumed one part of the story was the secret, but I was a little let down by Rand’s discovery as it related to Xanda. However, when all is said and done, I thought this was a really great book. It wasn’t just one of those “oh hey, another teenage pregnancy” kind of stories. I’ve read a lot of YA books in my time, and this was one of the few that really did YA right: no crazy/complicated love triangles, too mature for their age characters, or Gossip Girl-esque storylines. Holly Cupala definitely knows her stuff and I’m positive that if I had read this book in high school, I would have related to it even more than I just did a handful of years later. Go out and read this book!

Pride And Prejudice And Zombies
By Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith


rating: 2 out of 10 "books"


Pride and Prejudice and Zombies takes the classic Jane Austen story and attempts to transform it into a witty modern day zombie action story. Unfortunately, the outcome felt more smug to me than innovative. Although I had never read the original Pride and Prejudice and must confess it’s been months if not years since I’ve seen the film version, I was still interested to see how this “Quick Classic” Jane Austen fan-fiction would play out.

I learned that the majority of the original text had been preserved and thus left me wondering if some of the events listed in the book had actually occurred in the original, but the existence of zombies and ninjas tipped me off to the obvious additions of some situations in P&P & Zombies. The story follows the Bennets, a family of seven who are no different than any other of their low birth, except for the fact that Mr. and Mrs. Bennet’s five daughters are skilled in the “deadly arts.” For more than 50 years, England has been overrun by zombies, and in desperate times desperate measures must be taken. Elizabeth Bennet and her sisters had been trained in the deadly arts of combat at a very young age, and even sent to China to master the art of zombie killing. From the Bennet sisters’ training in their dojo, to the existence of ninjas in England to protect the affluent Lady Catherine de Bourgh, much of the story seems different from the original.

But of course where would this update to the classic be without the drama and gossip of the original? There are still all the balls, excitement over officers in town, obsession with marriage, proper etiquette, and who could forget Mr. Darcy?! As Elizabeth’s older sister, Jane, falls in love with the newly arrived Mr. Bingley, Elizabeth has the chance to meet and despise Bingley’s friend, Mr. Darcy. But events unfold and the two gentlemen return to London, much to the heartbreak of Jane, who was very much in love with Bingley. Elizabeth travels often; to see her dear friend and recently “plague stricken” Charlotte Lucas who has married Elizabeth’s cousin, Mr. Collins; to visit with and travel with her aunt and uncle, etc. But it seems she can never go too far without running into the proud and arrogant Mr. Darcy.

Elizabeth is almost no better in attitude and spirit than Mr. Darcy however. She proclaims that, “There are few people whom I really love, and still fewer of whom I think well. The more I see the world, the more am I dissatisfied with it; and every zombie confirms my belief that God has abandoned us as punishment for the evils of people.” She would much rather serve her King killing zombies as the “bride of death,” than entertain the idea of finding a proper husband. At the mention of her accompanying her aunt and uncle on an outdoor summer trip she replies, “What are young men to rocks and mountains?!” She is so set on hating Mr. Darcy, that she hardly has time to see any of his positive attributes. It is only when a series of events occur that Elizabeth begins to see the true side of Mr. Darcy, and against her wildest dreams, falls deeply in love with him.

When they are not fighting zombies, this whole book is about marriage (who is thinking of marrying whom, who is suitable to marry whom, who will make a good match, etc.), and gossip. Throughout the whole story people are gossiping behind each other’s backs instead of facing the matter head on. But then again, maybe this was the custom of the time, and besides, what else was there really to do back then? I just got really angry at Mrs. Bennet’s behavior. She was such an annoying character, obsessed with marrying off her daughter’s to big money. Elizabeth’s embarrassment for her family’s obsession with money and silly behavior was perfectly justifiable. Her mother went from hating a gentleman; to praising him when she found out he was to marry one of her daughters. Elizabeth’s youngest sister Lydia was no different. I could not stand this character and the way she behaved throughout the story. Elizabeth fantasized about chopping off her sister’s head, and I would not have minded if this had actually come to happen. What happened with her and the officer Wickham in the end of the story was the only thing that satisfied me with regards to that stupid girl.

There were some funny moments in the book that made the story somewhat enjoyable. One such moment occurred when Charlotte, who had been “stricken,” (bitten by a zombie), and was undergoing the transformation into a zombie herself, can only think about how delicious people’s brains would taste. When considering the proficiency of Mr. Darcy’s mind, “her thoughts would turn to the subject of chewing on his salty, cauliflower-like brain.” Elizabeth’s aunt also had some funny commentary to add to the story by commented on Mr. Darcy, stating that, “there is something of dignity in the way his trousers cling to those most English parts of him,” and after a visit to Pemberly and an encounter with Darcy, some chuckle-able moments ensue as Elizabeth remembers she has Darcy’s gun and ammo. Offering them to him, she says, “Your balls, Mr. Darcy?” As he reaches out and closes her hand around his bullets, he offers, “They belong to you, Miss Bennet.” But these laughable moments were hardly enough to make the book worth reading. Although the cover states that “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” makes the classic more enjoyable and less boring to read, I think it’s worth it to read it in its original form. Sure, the language may be a little daunting to read, but at least this way, you can honestly say you’ve read a classic Jane Austen story. My advice: save your money, and buy the original version for practically nothing, or borrow it from your library. Don’t waste your time on Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

*** UPDATE 12/15/09: It seems this book can be added to the book-turned-movies category as I've just learned that Natalie Portman has just signed on to play the Elizabeth Bennet character in a movie version of this story. Oh dear.... ***